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THE ILLUSION
OF MYSPACE/ Quite
fucked up and more or less organized ideas about myspace,
Something important
to notice: If you have more than 600 friends in your list: Do you
often listen to every single band that wants to be a part of your
friendship, and do you listen to it carefully to the point of checking
if you could like it or not? So, if you don't do so, why would most
of peoples do? No, don't tell me your band is more important or
better than others, many bands want to grow much bigger and gain
some status, at their own level, so many only want to click as fast
as possible and won't bother... I think, and
will keep to think it can only be better, or at least as good, to
answer a lenghty and personal interview for a webzine that last
because: Some reasons
for the lack of interest in interviews might be: It sometimes almost becomes a real fight to receive some answers! Months and months, many emails and diplomacy are needed (Because you try to keep it calm, not to bother the musician too much, unless he turns red and decides to definitely forget your interview)... Sometimes there's a tour, then there's a label change, then the rehearsing for the nexr album... And then there will the the recording, and then the promotion for the album (Wait... Isn't interview promotion? lol)... And almost a year has gone, your interview is still sleeping in some computer's thrashcan, and the band didn't find the time to answer (Yes, he didn't find 4 hours to answer in almost a year... But it's his fulltime job, right?)... So sometimes, the band finally says "Oh, sorry, I don't have a computer anymore, and well forget about the interview..." Fucking one year later!! Or your questions becomes quite outdated, so you have to rework it, and you're gone for other months of wait... I'm fucked... First, the bands didn't want to answer interviews by snail mail (Nor paper letters anymore.. It was too hard for their tiny fingers... But at least not having to retype everything isn't bad for the zine makers:-) I received some hand written interview lately, and it was "suprising" to retype everything lol), now they feel like "Interviews are too long and too "boooooring""... So what will be the next step? "Do not send us any email, never bother us in our divine position and fucking ORDER our music!!!"?. If your webzine
doesn't look like the last "Promotional" webzine with
at least 30000 visits per month, 20 reviews per day, and "attractive"
layout full of flying bullshits, rags, and news everywhere, you
will feel like some kind of poor guy in front of a bankman who won't
be interested in grating you any money... I often think with regret about the snail mail I could exchange with some bands in the past... Even if it wasn't always so long (After all, everyone has his own life and business to take care of) it was more personal, expressive, and sometimes you could have the surprise to receive a quite long and in depth answer from the musician of a band you really like... What about now? Many bigger bands receive so many emails and "Friend request" than they might have problems to handle the whole vomit of friendly love, so why would they bother making a little effort to decently answer your "shitty" question they already saw 20 times today (And after all, you could check the biography and interviews on their site, you lazy bastard! You're not a REAL fan! Coz REAL fans learn every interviews and FAQs by earth!!) and 100 emails remain to be answered in the following hour... So, what you deserve is what you get you lazy bastard! Almost Sms Bullshit, no punctuation, and minimum information (Fuck you! Check our website or the last trendy website if you want informations!). This turns out to be quite amusing, since you think about the fact many of these bigger bands have a... METAL JOB! Yes! I mean, to take care of everything concerning the band has became their fulltime job, and they need to have everything done Ok. So, what are they doing when they answer like fucking Sms premature ejaculation without any pleasure or personality? Commercial suicide? Of course, it can be understood peoples with a (Non metallic) fulltime job, family and other stuffs have problems to deal with the promotion and stuffs... But it often occurs that peoples who are meant to live for and by their bands show less comittment than those who do it on spare time... What the fuck? I'm confused. I also noticed
many of these so "Ooooold school" bands, who could have
seemed totally anti-modern, ant-computer, anti-webzine, anti-light
few years ago almost all suddenly rush on myspace, as if there was
a pot of holy honey behind their computer. That occurs to turn into
something really amusing, because where are the darkness, underground
vibes, and lenghty discussions they preached and used to deny anything
online? Certainly not on myspace, Fuck no!! Myspace is full of children
fun, very short chats (Who said scenesteries?) and light. In fact,
that do not REALLY matter to me, but it occurs to be quite strange
to see all these HARDEST and MOST DIE HARD ones of once, who used
to hate you so much coz you were NEVER Old school and musically-restricted
enough, suddenly turn their trousers on the side of the light, to
chat like the "Stupid teenages" they used to hate, and
click as hungry fuckers... lol It becomes somekind of real joke, because the peoples and fans who CARE about the bands, put of their soul and mind in the elaboration of decent to good interviews (For exemple), are more and more denied, to the profit of stupid webclickers who only need more friends... Hopefully, many deep underground bands keep an interest for interviews, and are still very happy to answer, so it's possible to run a zine in quite cool conditions... But try to interview a band from a bigger label with a busy shedule... You'll be bored begging before they do... Strange and confusing, I have the feeling more things were possible in the old underground than in the current scene: Even if everything seemed to be more expensive back then, everyone is currently so used to anything (Yes, everything is possible... So in a way everyone might have tried many of it, and they're bored... Overfucked by the abuse of anything in their blasted faces... A new CD? Bleeeuargh!... A new Demo? Even more Bleeeuargh!! A new Mp3?? Fucking BLEEEAURG!!) that it deserves much more work and money to release something, really spread the music of your band, and catch some interest... Some peoples will now think I'm a fucking blabbing liar flying too far from reality... Maybe, but face the facts: If you do not currently release a professionally pressed CD (=more $$$), have a super-good-hourahoura production (=more $$$), spend many hours per week on the web to promote your shit, many peoples will think you're not serious enough, and won't even bother! Didn't it seem easier and less expensive to release a demo on tape 15 years ago? Think about it: Tapes weren't so expensive back then, rehearsal recordings were seen as ok by zines (Cost = almost no $$$), demos were welcome in fanzines (While it isn't really nowadays... LOL), many tape traders used to dubb tapes of underground bands and spread their music (While most of the Mp3 traders only trade albums of the biggest bands with pro CDs and will spit in your face as demos have a shit sound (lol)). I have doubts and ideas about it. The current scene asks so much to the bands, to take them for serious and give them a status of "promising" band, that it is sometimes ridiculous... We're talking about music, and musical compositions, not any factors of second importance (Fuck your supergood production done in the lastest trendy studio of fagland, with mister supra teckhighproglo (Flavor of the month), with maximizer of ultra-tight illusion in Mount Ov Da Fags Studio (Masher Fag himselves!), and remastering by Lord supracool from Pouetland, Finally lowend remixing by dumbabass master at TikaTiko-Lab... Necessary endorsement by Takeson guitars and ChikoChika drums... If all these factors weren't present, we could wonder if it would sell any copy...)... The scene is supposed to help the bands (Criticism included, we're not sheeps), not to parasite them with all these top-of-the-moutain requests that need years and years of unmusical work... And all these useless friend requests and shitmails without care from myspace (Ah! In your face!!) Needless to mail me and scream: "You're a drunk retard who lives in the past!! Metal is now online and we're the future! Our bands are very busy and it's already very good that they dare answering your useless requests..." I definitely know that everyone can't spend more than 1 hour everyday on the web, but this article of vomit was motivated by (And contains some references to) various experiences I had with some bands from bigger labels, with big professional goals. (My mouth remains closed about their names... For now! Offer me enough money, and I'll spell it with an unholy pleasure héhéhé) Of course, these words might be a bit more negative and nervous than reality, and Myspace also has a good amount of qualities, it's a tool like many things... But as well as the web, the effects depend on the way peoples use the tool... And I must say it's kind of the big bullshit lead by fucked up reasons... METAL: SUCK MY COCK! WHERE'S YOUR UNDERGROUND NOW?? Conclusion: If
you don't run a BIG webzine, do not try to interview a band from
a too big label. The wait could be really exhausting, and you wouldn't
receive that much answers at the end... It's sometimes really better
to interview small bands (At the level of demos or very first album...
Sometimes answers appear in less than a week... And sometimes even
the same day! AAARRRGGGH!). |